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The Bench by Meghan, The Duchess of Sussex
Loathed though I am to line the pockets of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, especially the Duchess, I gave in and bought this. Not because I wanted to read it or anything like that, but I thought I should. It could be good. Meghan has never written a book before, so she could be good at it. Of course, the cynic and hateful person within me didn't expect much, but I still went in with an open mind. I decided to focus more on an objective critique of the book rather than personal biases toward the Duchess of Sussex. This would allow for a more fair and balanced review that can benefit readers looking for an unbiased opinion on the book. My feeling towards Meghan don't have any bearing on any skill she may have; after all, I have enjoyed an acting performance by her in the past.
I didn't buy the book's physical or even Kindle copy; instead, I opted for the audio version via Audible. The audiobook is read by the author. Using quite a soft, lilting voice, Meghan reads the poem she originally wrote for her husband. It can be hard to write a poem, especially if you want it to rhyme. It's easy to use an uneven rhythm, add or lose a syllable, and use a word spelled the same but doesn't actually rhyme many things. Especially if you have never tried before. One perk of an author reading their own work, is you hear exactly how they heard it as they wrote it. You get the right rhythm, the right inflection, the proper emphasis. In stories, you get the dialogue spoken how it's supposed to be. This, however, did not help in Meghan's case. She doesn't read her poem with rhythm. Therefore it doesn't sound quite right. It also has extra syllables here and there, which negates any rhythm you try to find yourself. To sum it up, it could be better, and the reading doesn't improve upon it.
The story itself is boring, and sounds rushed, like she was working to a deadline and didn't leave enough time to polish her work. It sounds more like a first draft than a finished product. I wonder if she just assumed it was okay or if it sounded good to her as she had written it. I don't know if it was suggested she edited it, or publishers either didn't want to say anything or counted on her name being enough to generate sales. I know this didn't do nearly as well as the Duchess hoped. It has been alleged that Meghan bought thousands of copies herself and distributed them to libraries in an attempt to boost its standing in ratings. The book only managed to sell 312 copies when it was first released. Many believe Meghan used an old trick, of buying them herself, to show a boost in sales. The book did make it onto the New York Times bestsellers list, and Meghan thanked her readers, though many believe it was the Duchess's effort and purchases that gave the book that particular accolade. In the UK, it failed to reach the top 50. It managed to creep its way onto the Amazon bestseller list; however, interestingly, the Amazon reviews have been deactivated. If you bought this book on Amazon, you can't review it on Amazon.
All in all, this book failed; to garner any significant attention or to be a must-read. Meghan could be a better writer. She may be better at the memoir she no doubt plans to release at some point. After the success of Spare (called Waaaah by many) her husband's bland, moaning memoir, she needs to put the spotlight back on herself and gain the sympathy she craves. Spare did sell 14.3 million copies on its release day. Her memoir may earn the nickname Woe Is Me or simply, Poor Me. I suspect it may just be titled Meghan; her self-love is very evident. So here is my review of The Bench. It's no good. There may be those who disagree, but, hey, it's art. If you have read it or had the dulcet tones of the Duchess read it to you, let me know what you think in the comments.
